Before I give you my personal opinion, let’s establish some common ground. Whether someone is leaning towards staying or going, we all, who find ourselves dealing with infidelity in our marriage relationship, must realize one thing: The covenant of our marriage vows has been broken.For whatever reason God, in His sovereignty, said that the act of infidelity would break that covenant.It says in the Bible:
It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce. But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.” Matthew 5:31-32
I decided that after putting that verse in there, I better have some commentary to put behind those words. The information I found in my NIV Study Bible states:
Jesus said that divorce is not permissible except for unfaithfulness. This does not mean that divorce should automatically occur when a spouse commits adultery. The word translated “unfaithfulness” implies a sexually immoral lifestyle, not a confessed and repented act of adultery. Those who discover that their partner has been unfaithful should first make every effort to forgive, reconcile and restore their relationship. We are always to look for reasons to restore the marriage relationships rather than for excuses to leave it.
From the beginning of Chris’ and my story, we have shouted from the rooftops, “It takes two people to be willing to do whatever it takes to make a marriage work.” And seven years later, we are still standing on that soap box.So, no. My personal opinion is that women and men shouldn’t be expected to stay with their cheating husbands or wives.Gasp. Wha? Watch your tongue! You sinner! You’re a pastor’s wife, and I can’t believe you said that! You should be removed from being a leader in your church!Remember, this is MY opinion based upon MY experience and MY understanding of God’s Word.My God is absolutely the Creator of the universe. He is infinitely more wise than I could ever dream. His power reaches into the galaxies and the stars are his handiwork. Nothing is too difficult for Him.But, He is also a gentleman. He doesn’t force us to follow Him or love Him. And there will be some men and women who choose to live in a place of hard-heartedness. Many of you have experienced this first hand and because of that, your marriage ended. But you’re still blessed, aren’t you? Because that’s the way God rolls.Wait, can I say that? Can I say “that’s the way God rolls“?
So, if you ever find yourself in these shoes, pray for God to tell you what to do. He will. I can promise you that. It’s wise to get counsel from other godly people in your life, but ultimately? The decision is between you and God.If you hear from Him that he wants you to trust Him and stay put, then get ready to have an intimacy with Him that you never imagined. And in the process, He will bring healing in His perfect timing that will astound you.
Alrighty. Let’s get at it.What’s YOUR opinion?