Risky Business

To risk is to expose to hazard or danger. I’ve got a newsflash for you:  Life is risky.  Everything about it.  Relationships.  Careers.  Health.  You name it.  We are in the business of life and it is risky.  Period. As a mother, I risk my heart continuously.  I may not be in any real physical danger by loving my sons, but emotionally, I am constantly placing my heart on the line because I love them so much.  Not trying to be morbid, but at any given moment during the day, they could be taken from me.  And if that happened, my heart would be ruined.  Of that, I am certain.  But I love them.  So I risk my heart. And they are worth it.  Every bit of the risk they are worth. But many people don’t get that.  They think they can walk right through life and never suffer any consequences from it.  That if they are safe enough and smart enough, they will be bypassed by certain hurts and pains that this fallen world brings. If I’m being honest with you, I have fears.  I know the Christian thing to do would be to tell you that I trust in the Lord with all my heart but quite frankly, I still find myself scared. Scared that I’ll experience more pain than I physically think I can handle.  Scared that those I’ve entrusted my heart to will turn on me.  Scared that when my life draws to an end that maybe nobody will care. But I do life anyway.  Because anything worth having involves risk.
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 3:14

4 thoughts on “Risky Business”

  1. “I know the Christian thing to do would be to tell you that I trust in the Lord with all my heart but quite frankly, I still find myself scared.” Do I ever know what you mean.

  2. Reminds me of CS Lewis:

    “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”

    There is also a popular position in Christiandom–especially in the dating/courting/wooing crowd–that if you do it “right” there will be no pain. In fact, that is often the motivation for doing it “right”: Avoid pain. And it bothers me. Immensely.


  3. I know what you mean. I am one of the facilitators for a new women’s study tomorrow. It’s feeling very risky. But, oh! What joy to watch what God will do with this if we remain humble, malleable and vulnerable!

  4. I guess I don’t have so much issue with my heart getting broken from the ones I love so dearly, family. I guess I just expect it to some degree and I am okay with that because I am sure at some point I have hurt them or will in the future.
    One of the hardest thing for me is to love myself. I am so very afraid of failure. I am okay with encouraging others and telling them what to do. Thats what I do as their mother. But, I have a problem doing what I need to do, doing what I know I should be doing, concerning spiritual, physical (I need to lose like 150 lbs), and letting God change me. I have failed in the past at endeavors and its very difficult to not look at that when trying to conquer these insecurities. I am having physical problems because I allowed myself to get out of control physically. I realize that physical problems sometimes stem from spiritual issues. I get upset at myself when I am in so much pain. I just don’t try a lot of new things. Then the risk is minimized. God gave me a dream, and I don’t dream very often, but in the dream he was giving me a heart transplant. So, I have hope. I just have to get and keep focused on God and not myself when he leads me. I am learning to lean, like the old song goes.

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