Motherhood

Raising Boys

cyn-boys-closeup.jpg

Well. I’ve got a LIH-tel experience to pull from. Only nine and a half years worth but still… NINE AND A HALF YEARS WORTH! My darling friend, Andi, aka The Running Mama, is busy with her two boys. If you’ve read her posts then you have been equally touched and entertained. Not only did Andi want to hear from me anything about raising boys, but so did a few others of you. Without further adieu, here are my ramblings thoughts on raising boys.
  1. Kiss his face. Everyday. A lot.
  2. Pray specific prayers over him regularly. (The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian has been a great resource for me. I even began praying those prayers over Noah while he was in my tummy πŸ™‚
  3. Read to him.
  4. Let him pee out in the backyard. He’s staking his claim, so to speak. It’s a proud moment.
  5. Teach him chivalry.
  6. Moms, don’t let him see you naked when he starts to smile at the sight of you and says, “Ooooo, I like those!” Did I say that out loud?
  7. Speak godliness over him and tell him he’s a warrior for God. He may not be now. Give him time.
  8. Let him build forts with his brother in the living room. Every day. Those blankets and pillows can be put up later.
  9. Tell him he is the apple of your eye and that you can’t believe God gave him to you.
  10. And for the love, let that boy get down and dirty in the mud. If you don’t have a play clothes drawer for your son, I’m talking to you πŸ™‚
In all actuality, most of these could be used for raising boys or girls. However, I cannot speak to raising girls since my home is filled with ladles of testosterone. I will tell you that one of the greatest things I did early on in my journey as a mother was to read Wild At Heart by John Eldredge. It changed me. It helped me see things from a different perspective. And it helped me realize that jumping on sofas and chairs, well, that is just good slap-your-knee-spit-in-someone’s-face kind of fun. I’m just sayin’ πŸ™‚

35 thoughts on “Raising Boys”

  1. Thanks for the advice! I have a 2 year old little girl and now a 2.5 month old little boy!

    I have read Wild at Heart and it totally helped me better understand my hubby!

  2. I remember reading “Wild at Heart” when my almost 6 year old boy was first born. It does help you understand that need to be adventurous in boys….and men. I do let my son pee outdoors. The problem is that my little girl follows suit. And, you know how much more of a mess it is when girls squat.

    Love those little boys. And, they looooove their mamas.

  3. My Boy ( who is 8) has such a tender heart and I love the way he just simply loves me. I read Robin’s comments and pray that I will still be “cool” when parents are no longer “cool” and I can get those hugs! It was hard enough to no longer be able to carry him and let that go…I would be crushed if sitting next to me is like the plague!

  4. gasp! you didn’t quite say it out loud. you did far worse:

    you typed it out.
    in plain english.
    black and white.
    on the world wide web.
    for the whole entire world to see…

    i’m not having boys. i’m not having boys. i’m not having boys.

  5. I always feel for my son, the middle child, who is sandwiched between two sisters with strong personalities. When his boy cousins come over, watch out, wrestling matches ensue in the living room. It’s so funny to watch how as soon as two (or more) boys are together they always have to wrestle πŸ™‚
    Thanks for the tip on the book, I’ll think I will pick that one up.

  6. That’s good advice. I’m the eldest of four sons. Perhaps I should get my poor, beloved, long suffering mother to offer her two cents at some point πŸ™‚

    Don’t pigeon hole every man in the Wild at Heart box. It may be true of some men. Possibly even a lot of men, but we don’t all fit into the gender stereotyping that the book engages in.

    For me the nature of a man is like the nature of God. Both the Lion and the Lamb. Sure there’s the protector and defender and provider. But there’s also a vulnerability and a sensitivity that is often overlooked. I don’t want to be Wild at Heart. I want to have God in it.

    And those boys look like they can get up to some amount of mischief πŸ™‚

  7. I have been blessed with one of each. Alot of those hold true to both. πŸ™‚

    Great Advice. I love the one about Play Clothes Drawer.

  8. Be careful about letting them pee in the backyard. My friend let her son do this and he commenced to whip it out at preschool and pee on the playground. The teachers were NOT impressed!

  9. Your boys are absolutely adorable.

    Having raised two boys, one of whom now serves in Special Forces, I heartily concur with your list.

    Raising boys is WAY different than raising girls. When my older (married) son wrapped the Christmas gift for his kid brother in a DIRTY SOCK, then duct-taped it, they both laughed their heads off on Christmas morning.

    My daughter would have cried.

    Yesiree. Boys are a real scream.

  10. Boys are so Awesome! As we were walking out the door this morning my oldest (7 yrs) says ‘I forgot something’ what? ‘I forgot my underwear’ are ya kidding me how do you forget to put on underwear? actually I have to check my 3 1/2 yr old all the time to make sure he has on underwear.. oh and he likes them backwards because that’s where the picture is and it needs to be in the front. Boys gotta lov’em

  11. One thing I would like to add. Listen when they talk. My favorite time of day with my son (12) and my daughter (15) is at night when I tuck them in and say goodnight prayers with them. (yes, we still do this). But that is when they talk and tell me stuff… heart stuff. Don’t miss out on that. It is so precious!

  12. This is something I work on everyday. I love my boys!!! When dad comes home I sometimes have to leave the room so they can just be boys and me not worry about them getting hurt=)

  13. Great post! I also have a house full of boys ~ husband Matthew, kids Joshua and Jake and pregnant with my 3rd boy! I love boys ~ they are so full of adventure and mischief and yet so tender and full of love for their mommy. πŸ™‚

  14. GREAT advice as usual. I also have three boys. I tell my boys every night how happy it makes me to be their mommy!

    My husband also regularly repeats to them “you’ve got what it takes.” I think kids (boys or girls) all need to know that we as their parents believe in them.

  15. That. Was. Awesome.

    I may have to print it out and hang it on the fridge.

    I loved Wild at Heart. I think I will read it again.

    Why do I get so teary-eyed when it comes to little boys? I didnt know I could love a stinky, bouncy, sweaty, crashing ball of energy in such a tender way.

    Anne M.- I love what you said. I want to raise MEN.

    For all the little boys we are raising, I pray strength and wisdom over them.

  16. In our home we work hard to raise “ladies and gentlemen”. Not that we stereotype, but we expect that at the appropriate times our girls will behave as ladies and our son will be a gentleman.

    I believe that just calling Zach a gentleman has done more for the development of that trait than anything else. At 9yrs old he opens the door for mom and 2 older sisters, helps with heavy things and ENJOYS the chivalry of it all. He is a wonderful husband in training. He finds the dishwasher AND the treehouse! I might not ever let him leave the house. πŸ™‚

  17. Great stuff. I’m hoping for some boys of my own someday. By then, we’ll be living in the country…lots of room to pee and play in the dirt. πŸ™‚

  18. boys will be boys!!!

    They have more fun by the way

    … make forts
    …… don’t have to squat
    ………….have play clothes!!!

    oh yea… my boy said “how come yours sag and dad’s doesnt?”

    I sent him out to the fort to sleep that night!!! Ha!!

  19. Great tips. I’ve got a 2 year old and boy do I love him. I see so much in him already, and daily I rub his head and pronounce the promises and favor of God on him. Although I’d love to have a little girl one day, I love my son and really enjoy being a mother of a boy.

  20. I can’t wait! But prepare yourself now to receive my calls and emails. Something tells me that I’m going to need advice from my seasoned-veteran friend. πŸ™‚

  21. If you allow your boys to pee in the backyard, just make sure you explain that it’s not appropriate to do on the playground at school.

  22. As a mother of three boys and a grandson on the way, boys are the best. I also have a great dt in law, who got her first taste of boys when she came into our lives ! Yes they will pee in the backyard, even on the mailbox in the frontyard if you are not careful ! But then they are the first to come running when you call and say you need help

    The youngest is stationed in Iraq, but still needs his mom.
    Especially when he needs something to be taken care of, he may be across the world, but you would think I was in the next room, when it comes to his “Mom I need you to …..”
    Yes honey, not a problem, I will get right on it.

    Even when the middle child decides to be a bouce back (wants to move back home, but you won’t let him !), you gotta love it. My new motto with him is “when do you start your new job, when does school start and when do you find a new couch to sleep on ?” He takes it in good humor, but the message is there. I will miss him when he leaves again.

    Moral of the story – Tell them you love them every day, more than once. When they are older, they will tell you they love you without you saying it first ! Never let them leave the house, anytime, without telling them you love them. As they get older, let them know you are praying for them. Never miss an opportunity with them, whether it is a water fight in the back yard, taking them to see a play, taking them and their friends to see a movie, the list goes on. One day they are you babies, the next day they are men in the army, having babies of their own or trying to find their way in life.

    To be sure you will always be Momma. Thank you Lord and halleujah for boys.

  23. I’ll add one more piece of advice: Don’t try to hold hands with your 7-year-old when he’s wearing his football uniform and pads. Apparently that’s embarrassing! It’s all good; in a house of all men (husband and three sons), I AM the Queen. I’m just the queen with a lot to learn!

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