Motherhood

Pop-Ice Wrappers And Expensive Electricity Bills

My coffee maker starts grinding beans at precisely 6:00 a.m. most mornings.  That is my indication that the day is just beckoning for me to come join it.  After a couple of tosses and turns, I wake up to a quiet house except for the percolating of the blessed morning juice I will soon consume.  It will be my companion while I read the Word of God, check my email and then follow up with my favorite Twitterers. After pouring my first cup drenched with fat-free French Vanilla Coffee Mate creamer and some Splenda, I round the corner and peer up the stairs and notice my youngest son’s light left on.  I realize that it was on all night long because he spent the night in my bed taking his Daddy’s place while he was on a trip.  I sigh a heavy sigh and am slightly annoyed that said light has not only cost us more money in utility expenses but has also cost the universe something, too.  Because I have gone green, you understand. Forgetting the light because I am not awake enough to go up the stairs, I proceed to my study.  This is the place where I find my solace.  The view from its window isn’t necessarily a breathtaking one but it certainly causes me to breathe deep as I survey the acreage nearby with trees dispersed here, there and yonder.  There is something peaceful about watching God’s creation do what it does, which is pretty much be. Finishing up those morning tasks, I remember the load of laundry that needs to be tossed once again to remove the wrinkles that accumulated overnight.  After 10 minutes I return to begin the folding process.  I retrieve jeans, shirts, socks and pop-ice wrappers that were left in the pockets of my oldest sons shorts.  Slightly irritated I mumble something to myself about having a dime for every time I found one of those little suckers in the laundry. But as quickly as I get annoyed or irritated with the piddly stuff that my children do, I am exhorted by my future 55 year-old empty nester that I will miss all of this.  She tells me that I won’t always buy fruit roll-ups or drive the carpool or wipe down hand and footprints off walls or convince them that vegetables are really better than candy. No, the day is quickly approaching when I won’t do much, if any, of the above.  I’ll find myself folding laundry and something will remind me of the pop-ice wrappers I used to find and I’ll smile because I’ll actually miss them.  I won’t find lights on anymore but sort of wish I would because it would mean activity is near.  I won’t have an assortment of Little Debbie snacks in the house because they are not great for an aging woman’s health.  My lightswitch plates will be clean.  My floor will hardly need vacuuming but I’ll do it anyway because I like the the stripes it makes on the carpet. And I will call a friend and reminisce about those days where they equally drove me crazy and caused my heart to stir in the same moment.  We’ll talk about the great times with our kids and we’ll wonder when they are going to give us grandchildren that we can spoil and send right back to them. It’s hard to imagine that I’ll be there before I know it.  While I feel I’ve wished away too many months, even years of their lives, I have chosen to live in the here and now for the rest of their days.  Sure, frustrations will arise and I will wonder how much longer until they go off to college, but in my heart, I’ll always want them near me. For they are my boys and I am their momma. Nobody loves them like their momma.

19 thoughts on “Pop-Ice Wrappers And Expensive Electricity Bills”

  1. I am a mother of four grown children ages 35-22,and a grandmother of 9, ages 18monthes-20 years, two of these grandchildren I am raising, both boys, 3 and 7. The circumstances of why I have these boys is not important anymore, whats important is raising them to be Godly men and letting them have a happy memory filled childhood. These little pockets filled with rocks, tooth picks and other misc. boys things make me smile and laugh sometimes. The clothes covered with mud and melted snow don’t bother me because I know how much fun they had getting that way. I didn’t feel this way the first time around and sometimes it hurts my heart, but God has given me a second chance to see this. Sometimes I think about the empty nest that will come, when I’m 70! and I’m not sure I ever want an empty nest again. Thanks for listening, I really enjoy this blog.

  2. It does come…my youngest is off to college this fall and my husband has left the marriage, I KNOW GOD is with me…He’s just so QUIET! ENJOY the NOISE…sounds like you do! Prayers Please, for my broken heart to quiet down, the loneliness is LOUD…GOD BLESS YOU>

  3. I am a mother of 2 boys who are my world. The oldest is in college but still lives at home. The youngest is now in high school and wants to go away to college. I am surprised by how fast the time has passed. I too feel like I wished away too many days, months and years while they were small. I miss those days. How I would love for them to ask me to go outside and play with them, run through the sprinkler or go for an ice cream. I miss the days when mommy was their best friend. I still love to creep into their rooms while they are sleeping and just watch them. I don’t know what I will do when the house is empty. I already deal with anxiety issues over this thought. If I could only go back and slow down the clock. I would cherish each moment more and do so many things differently. Please remember me in your prayers. God bless you.

  4. Hi Cindy,

    Sitting here at work…should be working, but I receive my daily devotions through Streaming Faith. I read this devotion on you have a file and I feel like this is so real and the womem in my circle. So, as I always do, when it’s an unknown author or guest I always click on their website or blog to see what they are about. Wow….I’m sorry, but I was first taken by can I pour you a cup, since I’m a coffeeholic and then as I read your post, 2nd paragraph I was again taken away….it’s how I drink my coffee to a tee and I’m trying to go green. As I read further and felt what you were feeling as you described the wrappers….I too am about to experience 1/2 a empty nest with my youngest going away to college next week. You totally captivated me in this blog and I a for life fan. God is so good in connecting real people. I love to share more with you and I will offline maybe. I’ve wrote too much…hope it doesn’t cut off. Thanks for a wonderful post!!

  5. I must comment again….just reading the comments has been a blessing to me today. I really, really needed this reassurance of a child leaving and being at peace with the Children God has given you that are still not leaving although old enough to be in college, yet taken alternate routes to their destiny. But God is still in charge. Thanks again for such a beautiful post and “real”! Forgive all my grammar mistakes….lol….When I’m excited about something I can’t stop. Much love to you all!!

  6. Cindy, thanks again. I attempted to email you before after reading my daily devotion, but had to go back to work. I am the one all my girlfriends come to with their concerns/problems, I listen and tell them that their are hundreds of women just like us throughout the world. Yet, our God is sooooooo good; and never stop believing. My son’s are now 25 and 22 and both left home after college, my husband is deceased so I am home alone, sometimes I talk to my husband spirit and wish he was still here, but I take my own advice and believe my God is sooooooooooo good, and all will be okay. Keep writing these blogs. I will keep listening to my girlfriend circle. We don’t even realize it but we have a world of girlfriend circles. Again, thanks!

  7. Very good stuff! Keep sharing. I am reminded that one day I too, will be an empty nester and will think back fondly on forgotten fruit snack wrappers and fingerprints on the french doors. 🙂

  8. God is so amazing. Its past 10:00 and I’m still in the bed, checking my email and ran across this blog.
    I have two sons, 21 and 25. Both college grad
    s. The oldest moved back home and is working in his field. The yo
    ungest is starting graduate studies about 3 hours away. These boy
    s have been the focal point of my life-not my career, not my 28 yea
    r marriage, not me. I am beginning to think that this is the proble
    m. You see recently my youngest, who is mostly like me, told me t
    hat for the first time in his life I had let him down and dissapointed
    him. He said that I never stand up for myself with my hus
    band. My husband chimes in to say that I never tell them (corre
    ct or guide ) anything.
    Long story long, I can not seem to recover from this pain. Its bee
    n about a month and eveyone seems to have moved on except me.

    In pain

  9. This is so true!!! I’m a mom of a 5 years old son, who will soon start school. He is super excited but I super nervous and afraid. Our kids can make us lose our mind and energy but we will always be there mommy and they will always be our kids. My son is the best give God has given me. I love ” my honey” with all my heart. I called him my “honey” because he is as sweet as honey can be.
    Thank you for sharing this message with us Cindy.

  10. Sigh… This will keep me smiling while I’m folding clothes. Pretty much.

    Miss you so much. Maybe you could retire a little further South and we could watch God’s creation “be” on the same back porch. I’m just sayin’ too. 😉

  11. I’m in love with my 9 yo boy and every day keep reminding myself why I left a crazy busy career to be a better mom and wife.

    Because. it. matters.

    Keep writing ….

    V.

  12. It could be pregnancy hormones making these tears soak my face, but I doubt it.

    Great blog.

    And, very, VERY well written, Mrs. Beall.

  13. I’m all teary now. Great post and it made me smile about yesterday’s popcorn kernel fiasco.

  14. That was a great write up reminder to enjoy life!! I have an 88 year old Mom that is much in my life, and it reminded me to savor that time I have with her!! To treasure it! Thank you for the reminder. I have GRANDchildren to enjoy too. We get second chances!! Loved it!!

  15. Very intersting. I got home late with my daughter falling asleep in her car seat this evening. As I carried her in, jugling my purse, her and finding the right key to get into my apartment building then into my apartment, I was awarded the opportunity to steal in a kiss on her little nose, and the sweat smell of her little girlness about her as she adjusted and snuggled in for the ride up the stairs. Oh how I think about those days as I don’t know what God has in store for me and my future of having more babies. I’ve had the privilage this summer of watching her grow into a little person, and not just a toddler, but getting to know her self as a person within her sorroundings. I don’t want her to grow up!

  16. Very nice blog. A good friend and fellow pilot told me one day that you will blink your eye and they will be gone. It’s not quality but quantity in life and relationships.

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