Mentoring

Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater

If you are familiar at all with the 1990’s sitcom Friends, then you know of the love story between Ross and Rachel. Oh, Ross and Rachel.  I watched each show religiously, I am certain, and after ten long seasons, they finally ended up together.  The way it should’ve always been in Friends land. What? Anyway, during one of the seasons Ross and Rachel broke up.  Rachel didn’t feel they broke up but Ross was famous for saying “we were on a break.” While on this break, Ross was with another woman and it broke Rachel’s heart.  As you can imagine she told her friends and her mother.  Her mother told her, “once a cheater, always a cheater.” Personally, I think that is one of the most ridiculous quotes ever said. Saying that quote is like saying that just because somebody is or does something once means they will always be or do that same thing. Like, once a teenager, always a teenager. Or once an arrogant jerk, always an arrogant jerk. See what I’m sayin’? My Rant: Like people can’t change.  Come on.  Are you kidding me?  I am SO different than I was in high school…than I was eight years ago…than I was eight months ago.  People change.  Sometimes it is a good change, other times it isn’t.  People make choices that aren’t always the best, they realize it and then decide to make things different.  It happens all the time.  I’ve seen it.  I’ve experienced it.  I believe with everything in me that people can change. Our actions don’t define us.  We can’t let them define us.  We have to let who God says we are define us. I am a child of God. I was bought with a price.  I am a co-heir with Christ.  I am a friend of Christ.  I belong to God.  I have been forgiven and redeemed of all my sins. Let’s don’t label people by their past.  Let’s call them who they are according to the Creator of the universe.

12 thoughts on “Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater”

  1. Wow, I felt like you were talking directly to me. I remember saying that quote “once a cheater always a cheater”, and it’s not true people DO change. Thank you for that excellent word today!

  2. I didn’t always believe what you are saying, Cindy. But PTL that I do now. God loves me and forgives me even when others might not. And he changes me and makes me brand new. I LOVE getting “makeovers” from my God! (‘Cause sometimes I am SOOO ugly on the inside, but He makes me beautiful again!)

  3. This is SO true…and I’ve admittedly been guilty of saying it, just in a different area: “Once an abuser, always an abuser.”

    I’ll be honest and say I still struggle with that one. BUT…I also know that you are completely right that IT IS RIDICULOUS to say such a thing! If God can change Paul, then WOW! Who couldn’t He change?

    Thanks for reminding us of this, and also convicting me in my natural thought tendencies.

  4. Would you believe I was just talking to a friend today about this very thing? In fact, my words to her were something like: “My least favorite saying in the whole world is ‘Once a cheater, always a cheater!’ It just chaps my hide. ” But, truthfully, I don’t know that I would believe it wasn’t true if I hadn’t experienced the redemption of God in my marriage and witnessed the transformation of a life. So, in response to your very passionate rant: Amen and amen.

  5. Amen! My marriage has been redeemed from the sin of adultery, and so I particularly cringe at that line. But I kinda enjoy it when people say things like that in front of me. It gives me a chance to share my testimony…

    and then I also love watching them try to wriggle out of it.

    😉

  6. Cindy,
    It has been weeks since reading your blog. I am thankful for God’s forgiveness. He has changed my heart for it was hardened in the PAST. You and Chris are inspiration to me as I seek patience in restoring my marriage. In doing so, I can once again be able to be a part of my 4 boys’ DAILY lives.
    Please pray for my wife as she heals.

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