It’s official. I’ve spent more of my life without my Dad than I did with him. This coming March will mark 20 years since his passing when I was merely 19 years old. I rarely voice it to anyone, but I miss him more now than I did when I was 20, 25 or even 30. The only reason I know this is because during coffee a few weeks ago my friend actually asked me about him and how I got over his death. Imagine my surprise when those words came out of my mouth: “I miss him more today than I did back then.” I miss that he doesn’t know that I have a diploma hanging on my wall from the same university that he did. I miss that he doesn’t know that I fell in love with my husband in the exact same town that he did with my mom. I miss that he’ll never hear my sons laugh or see them play a sport. I miss that he missed the best of me because I was a punky teenager the last time he talked to me. I’ve healed from his death. I’ve dealt with issues that bothered me about him. I’ve let go of things that happened and didn’t happen. I now just remember the great times and his silly antics. My father would have talked to anyone and anything that moves. He was the life of the party and everyone’s friend. He worked hard but also rested hard. Maybe a little too hard, right Mom? 🙂 My Dad was passionate and dare I say it, a little on the gullible side. I shriek to think what my dad would have done if he received an email stating that “he has the opportunity to earn 10% of 2,500,000,000 if he’ll just give them $1,500 to get the ball rolling.” According to my mother, I am my father. And I take that as a wonderful compliment. Many of us in life have lost people “before their time”. Children aren’t supposed to die. Siblings aren’t supposed to miss the birth of their first niece or nephew. And Fathers are supposed to walk their daughters down the aisle on their wedding day. If you know someone who has lost someone close to them even if it was 20 years ago, take a moment to ask them about it. Sometimes it’s just nice to remember. Thanks for asking, Marcy.