Motherhood

My Annual Review

I was watching the news last week and they said that if a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) had a salary it would be $117,000 a year. $117,000 A YEAR. And that got me to thinking. Most people who have “real” jobs out in the world get annual reviews from their superiors. This is usually a once-a-year occurrence that is often followed by an increase in pay and sometimes even a bonus. Now, let me make things clear. Chris Beall, affectionately referred to on this site as the Hubby, is extremely grateful for the things I do for our family. He tells me regularly how much he appreciates me. So, I do feel the love from him. However, he has never sat me down and given me a real “review”. If he did, I figure it might go a lil somethin’ like this:
Cindy, wow, you have certainly amazed me this year. There is no one like you in the SAHM category. I’d like to process through the strides I’ve seen you make for our family and well, they are wonderful. Let me unpack a few things for you. Some of the ways I felt you went above and beyond are how you made a spreadsheet for all of the cleaning that you want to get done at different times of the year, another spreadsheet for when we need to pack for a trip, and yet another spreadsheet for the grocery store. You’ve really blessed our family with your spreadsheets. I am equally impressed with the way you manage our monthly budget and how you make our money go exceedingly farther by buying generic items at the grocery store. I have enjoyed the new meals you have cooked from watching Paula Deen and Racheal Ray on The Food Network. Paying our monthly cable bill is money well spent, in my opinion. It is also impressive to watch how you can manage the boys’ schedules complete with waking them, bathing them, preparing their meals as well as spending time on one-on-one counseling and providing the necessary discipline when they are not obeying. I also love it when I come home from work and find all of my clean clothes nicely put into my chest of drawers. That’s uh-MAY-zing. I so appreciate how you love me and support me and are always there for me, if you know what I mean, wink, wink. However, while you are one tremendous woman, there are a few areas where I think some improvement could be made. I’d really like to see a little more cleaning around the baseboards so that the dust bunnies don’t end up all over the house because that just annoys me. There have been a few times where we’ve run out of Diet Coke with Lime and that’s just something that sends me over the edge. I’m just sayin’. Finally, if you could make sure you keep the back porch swept regularly, that would be great. Because you have performed so incredibly this year, I’d like to offer you a 7% raise that will take your salary up to $125,190 a year. Obviously, I cannot pay that to you because I don’t even make that myself. However, I would like to continue to provide for you financially so that you don’t have to get a 9-5 job. I will continue to help out with the boys while you take evening walks, clean the windows since you don’t like to do that, and support you when you want to go to Hobby Lobby and Kirkland’s. I would also like to offer you a weekend away with your girlfriends as well as take you on a cruise…just you and me, without the children.
Thank you for your time and for all you do for the Beall family.
Ain’t he the greatest?

17 thoughts on “My Annual Review”

  1. 1 timothy 6:6 comes to mind…but godliness with contentment is great gain.

    god’s pretty smart…when we find that sweet spot of knowing his will for our life…our marriage…being underpaid doesn’t feel like under-appreciated.

    funny how we often confuse sacrifice for that.

  2. What an amazing job He’s blessed you with!!! 🙂 I think the review process should include a spreadsheet as well. You’d get all ‘outstanding’s, except for the baseboard part but who really gets all of that anyway!

  3. My, my, my, what a great boss. My guy gives a “bonus” for sweeper marks in the carpet and Fresca in the refrigerator.

    Hey, can I get a peek at your grocery spreadsheet? I was working on one that would project the total cost so I can make some decisions ahead of time! (I’m a spreadsheet nerd too)

  4. You think your boss can call my boss? And, you if you really have spreadsheets, I’m all the more impressed. Perhaps, if I could watch the food channel a little more and apply what I learn in the kitchen then I’d get that cruise, too.

  5. This was GREAT!

    This had me laughing: You’ve really blessed our family with your spreadsheets.

    As well as the cable talk.

    As a fellow SAHM, I am thankful for cable/internet and see it as a wise investment in my sanity. Funny.

    Good job, Mom. And good job, Chris…you give great reviews. 😉

  6. I loved your post today. 🙂 I’m a SAHM and also like spread sheets and lists. I thought I was the only one who made them for my household chores, lists for different stores, etc. My hubby thinks I’m nuts for wanting to “document” them, but it helps…doesn’t it? 🙂 I love to “watch” the Food Network when I’m in the kitchen. My hubby likes the inspired food so much that it was his idea to construct a special TV set up for my kitchen viewing pleasure.

  7. You and I must be separated at birth, I have a cleaning spreadsheet as well!!! Don’t you just love Excel, my life would be amiss without it!

    Love the review!

  8. “$117,000 A YEAR.”

    That’s it! 😀

    Several years ago I was involved in a jury dirty case involving medical malpractice. The women had Inflammatory Breast Cancer that had gone undetected, clearly unnecessarily, and was given 2 years. One of our jobs was to calculate her worth each year. WOW – was that a process! We had to call chefs, house cleaners, dry cleaners, personal shoppers, interior decorators, tons of different “services”…I think we came up with nearly 400,000.00 per year. We gave the total to the judge and he said, “That’s it!” So he added more.

  9. Wouldn’t that be awesome if it really worked that way? Wow, all of us mommies would have some do-ra-me to take more trips to our favorite spots to re-charge!…and of course spend on the kids and hubbies!

  10. that is amazing. 🙂 wouldn’t it be something if SAHMs got the feedback they deserved? thanks for making me smile, Cindy. your blog continues to bless me

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