I load up my black Honda Pilot with his Tball gear as he hops in the back seat. I wonder if he’ll stay awake for the 20-minute trek to our house after just playing his heart out. I turn the engine over and the tunes immediately start blaring from my previous drive. Click, click, click. The CD changer goes to the 3rd CD at my command and some more melodic tunes starts playing. I keep going forward and get to song #5 because it is his favorite. I know this because every time it starts he says, “this is my favorite song, I will rise, Mommy.”
I won’t lie and tell you that this song doesn’t hit me in the deepest parts of my heart. Many times I’ve ended up in tears as the words have flowed from my speakers.
There’s a peace I’ve come to know. Though my heart and flesh may fail. There’s an anchor for my soul. I can say, “it is well”. Jesus has overcome. And the grave is overwhelmed. The victory is won. He is risen from the dead.
I know that peace. It has been the calm in a very tumultuous storm for me many a time. I’ve said “it is well” on more occasions than I can even remember because I trust my God so fully. I don’t always understand. And I certainly don’t always like the outcome. I know that there will be many more things to come in this life that I will not grasp.
And I’m totally okay with that.
But one thing I do get, one thing I do know is that God inhabits the praises of His people. So when my 5 & 1/4 year old starts singing at the top of his lungs words that he does not even comprehend, my heart is soaring. Fewer things can top that moment.
And I will rise when He calls my name. No more sorrow, no more pain. I will rise on eagles’ wings. Before my God, fall on my knees. And rise. I will rise.
I imagine that the heavens were smiling and rejoicing at Seth’s song. He doesn’t say every word correctly. He still says “wise” for “rise” and “sowwow” for “sorrow”, but my gut tells me that his Heavenly Father doesn’t mind at all. In fact, He might be in the heavens saying, “Look how adorable Seth Beall is. He can’t say the words correctly. But he still sings with his whole heart.”
In a world of Spongebob Squarepants, XBOX 360 games, and getting air on his dirt bike, my son’s heart is singing the praises of our Savior. And he doesn’t even quite know it.
I guess I’m doing something right on this motherhood journey.
And I’ll rest in that for now.