11 thoughts on “If She Would Have…

  1. It is encouraging for me to hear you be so bold and put people in their place (rightly so).

    So many times I have chosen to to ‘ignore’ comments when I would liked to have told someone to mind their own business.

    I think I will practice saying something like, “You don’t have all the information.” or “You don’t know the whole story.” Then if it comes up in the future maybe I won’t feel so defensive or helpless.

    Thank you for the ideas!

  2. Thanks for speaking out Cindy, one reason I admire you so much. People like Lisa said don’t have all the info. I’m on the other side of this and I love my husband with all my heart, but Chris’ addiction started long before he married you and no matter who you love that addiction needs to be fed, until we figure out what true freedom is. We do not plan out our days saying ” Today I’m going to use porn and hurt my wife or husband.” It’s only through God can we become truly free and with true repentence. Both of which Chris did. Look how many people your story has helped, don’t let people who have no idea tear you down.
    Blessings Sarah 🙂

  3. Even if your husband or wife is not addicted to porn…all of us are trying are best and there is not an excuse to look outside the marriage. If the wife or husband isn’t doing enough then first attempt should be to reconcile before looking to someone or something else.
    I also have heard people say, “well men cheat all the time” and “look at how many couple’s stay together”.
    First, it is not acceptable for a husband to cheat just because “men do it all the time”. That does not take the pain away from this type of betrayel. Yes, it is nice to have resources to turn to in this situation…but I didn’t get married expecting my husband to cheat and as far as I know I was doing everything in my marriage to be the best wife possible.
    Thank you for sharing this today. I’m glad God is healing you through these types of comments. And I pray women and/or men will stop thinking cheating is part of married life.

  4. God knew you needed to make this video. One the questions I asked my husband over and over again was “Why was I nottingham enough?” “Why did you need to go back to her right after we were married?” “What excitement did she provide for you that I didn’t give you?” and other similar type ?’s. He tried to reassure me over and over that his affair had nothing to do with me. He said he was already a sick man when I married him. He said, “why does the dog return to his vomit, why does the drug user go back to his drugs?” This was very hard for me to accept but I had to realize that he was right. Like you said I wasn’t perfect but was a good wife. Thank you for sharing on this!

  5. I thank God for you and Chris and the transparency that you share through your story. I firmly believe that God lead me to you all, to hear a specific word last night on YouTube. Cindy when you said, “You are not a fool to stay and be a redemptive part of a mans life” my heart was changed! I felt like I could breath and move forward without being stuck in my pain! I know that there will still be pain, however through all of this I know that God is who I can trust and He will be my refuge! I have hope. THANK YOU! May God continue to bless your union and change marriages all over the world.

  6. Cindy, Thank you for sharing your heart. I just wrote you an email with our story. You’re right, you can give pure love, put 100% over and beyond into a marriage, but if he’s so steeped in addiction, he cannot feel nor respond the way God intends. Thankful that God is doing a work and bringing his heart back towards home, but it’s a long journey

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